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There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but the waters can feel choppy out there for the over-40 set.

Dating apps and websites, they tell The Post, have been both a godsend and a nightmare.

“A lot of the problems that older individuals are facing when online dating have to do with their expectations,” relationship coach Marisa T. Cohen, 35, tells The Post. Since boomers and Gen Xers didn’t grow up with social media, they struggle to understand its nuances.

So let these local singles shed some light on the most popular digital dating options. Here’s what they had to say about the best and worst of eHarmony, Match.com, OurTime, Lumen and more.

Tinder

Among its younger users, Tinder — which lets nearby singles swipe through each others’ profiles — is traditionally considered more of a hookup app than a place to find a love connection. And while Tinder tells The Post that 38% of users are 35 and older, New York singles in that bracket say they haven’t had the best luck finding love there.

“I’m not a Tinder person — there’s a whole sub-genre of bots, hookers and hackers,” says Neal, a 49-year-old divorced dad who otherwise loves the app scene. (He declined to share his last name, lest it hurts his dating prospects.) He says he once may have narrowly evaded a date with a prostitute on the app.

Maria Miliotis, a 49-year-old from Queens, also isn’t a fan. “I’ve had men half my age send provocative messages and d–k pics” on the app, says the twice-married hair and makeup artist.

Bumble

Consider this the Sadie Hawkins option: It’s set up so that only women can reach out to men. (Unless you’re gay, in which case, anyone can reach out first.)

“Bumble has been my favorite so far,” says Donna Pettigrew Fillweber, a 55-year-old entrepreneur from Pompton Plains, New Jersey. “It’s your choice.”

Todd Kosik agrees. Divorced, 46 and living in Livingston, New Jersey, he believes that having the lady reach out first is much easier than walking over to a woman in a club, which is how he met his ex-wife when he was in his 20s.

Still, just because Bumble is women-driven doesn’t mean that they can let their guard down entirely. Miliotis says she’s noticed her friends’ photos being used in scammer profiles on the app.

Plenty of Fish

This website doesn’t share an age breakdown, but the site itself is a dinosaur by digital dating standards. It has been around since 2003 and has singles take a personality test to help match them with people with whom they might have chemistry. The pro is that there are tons of people on it. The con is that there are maybe too many people on it.

More On: dating apps

“You get ones from the bottom of the ocean messaging you,” Fillweber says. “It’s kind of sad these men think they have a chance.”

In particular, she’s noticed that guys tend to drag conversations out for a long stretch of time on this site — maybe because it’s more desktop-focused than app-based, lending itself to drawn-out exchanges.

“You’re a grown-ass man, ask a lady out if you’re interested,” says this mother of two. “This isn’t pen-pal time.”

Lumen

This dating site is exclusively for singles 50 and over, which makes it the dating site of choice for singles such as Maria Rodriguez, 54. The county social services worker, who divorced in 2018 after a 29-year marriage, says swiping’s the only way to go.

“I’m shopping around,” says Rodriguez, who likes that her app of choice — Lumen — helps her weed out potential sleazeballs by limiting the number of conversations users can initiate and banning photo DMs.

eHarmony

While the company declined to provide any data on its over-40 population to The Post, the site is “pretty much the go-to for marriage-minded people looking for love that will last,” according to Mashable. The company surveyed singles in 2010 and found that the internet is the best way for people over the age of 50 to meet and marry, so if you’re in it to win it, this could be where you find your soulmate.

“In my life,” dating sites such as eHarmony “are the greatest thing ever,” Neal says. “I get all my dates without leaving my bed.”

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Hinge

This is another popular one among the middle-aged dating set, and for good reason: It’s closely linked to Facebook, a platform that users in that age group are already familiar with. You can opt to log in through Facebook, so you can find potential matches who are in your Facebook friends-of-friends network.

Although Hinge declined to share numbers on its user makeup, several 40-plus New Yorkers we spoke to are fans — and appreciate that their connections are kind of pre-vetted by their friends of friends.

“It’s nice to see what’s out there. It’s exciting,” says Kosik, who says that 75% of his dates come through this app and Bumble.

Kosik says the only drawback to Hinge — although perhaps it’s a blessing in disguise — is that it’s pretty glaring if women don’t respond to his messages in a timely fashion. He says he finds himself losing patience with dawdlers.

“If a woman takes days to respond to a text,” he says, “I’m not interested.”

Match.com and Ourtime.com

About 2 million users this year alone have signed up with Ourtime, run by the parent company of Match.com. While 31% of Match.com users are millennials, the rest are between the ages of 39 and 74, the company tells The Post.

IAC, which owns Match.com and Chemistry.com, started Ourtime.com in 2011 for 50-and-over singles looking to date. “We saw a fervor for something just for them,” says Joshua Meyers, CEO of People Media, the targeted-dating subsidiary of IAC.

Are you searching for the best M4M personals sites to sign up to? Well, you’re in luck because I will be discussing the top 9 best M4M personal sites below and as well as what happened to Craigslist personals site.

Our society is becoming more and more open to the third sex, which is why there has been an increase in M4M personals sites today. In fact, same-sex marriage has been approved in many states and even other countries. This simply means that we are embracing them, which is the right thing to do. In this article, I will give you an idea of what M4M is all about and the top 9 best M4M personals sites.

What Does M4M Mean?

M4M simply means men for men or men who also likes men or popularly known as gays. M4M is used in the online world to differentiate gay men and gay women. Usually, dating sites are using this abbreviation on their websites to simplify the words men for men. Even gays are using this for different reasons; some use it to be discrete when talking about personals sites of dating sites.

Here are our top picks:

Best M4M Hookup Sites (Top 5 Picks)

1. Adult Friend Finder Review

One of the M4M hookup sites today is Adult Friend Finder, which is a platform where M4M can find someone that they can hook up with. This hookup site offers different kinds of arrangements, including monogamy, fuck buddies, polygamy, and couple share. Adult Friend Finder is a haven for men who are looking to enhance their sex lives go here for fun.

Features On Adult Friend Finder

Adult Friend Finder is equipped with different features, including Live Member Webcams, which will let you watch other members who are broadcasting themselves publicly. Another great feature is the Sex Academy, which will provide you instructional videos for oral and anal sex. There are also some tips that you will find very useful as well.

How They Manage Scams

Adult Friend Finder will ask for your email address so they can verify your identity. If you don’t provide any, a password will not be sent to you.

Pros:

With all its amazing features, they will surely help you find a great match.

Cons:

Requires a subscription so you can use all the features.

2. BeNaughty Review

If you’re looking for a hookup site for M4M, then BeNaughty is the one for you. With its easy to use and simple website design, you will be able to browse through the site smoothly. One of the best things about BeNaughty is that all members are very active when it comes to the messaging function of the website.

Features On BeNaughty

One of the features of BeNaughty is that it has a Full Safe Mode, wherein only members who are verified can send you messages. Also, the site will let you promote your account so a lot of M4M can see you.

How They Manage Scams

They manage scams by verifying their members and via the Full Safe Mode feature that the site has to offer. Other than that, there are no additional security measures.

Best Hookup Dating Site For Over 40

Pros:

Thousands of active M4M to message and meet up.

Cons:

The security feature is weak.

3. Grindr

One of the best M2M dating app and hookup app as well is Grindr, which was launched in the year 2009. It is a location-based app, wherein the people that will only show up on your page will be the ones who live near you. Currently, Grindr has 27 million members and counting. Their members are from all over the globe, and that’s how popular they are.

Features On Grindr

One of the best features on Grinder is Tap, wherein you can use it to let a member know that you’re interested. If you are too shy to send your first hi, then the Tap feature will do. You will be able to catch their attention in no time.

How They Manage Scams

To make Grindr a safer community for all M4M, they require a verification process to each member that they have. Once a member violates the guidelines of the app, the member will automatically be deleted or banned.

Pros:

User engagement is higher compared to other M2M dating apps.

Cons:

Only premium subscribers can use the live chat.

4. Hornet

Another great M2M hookup site is Hornet, which will let men connect with a lot of members in a meaningful way. The community in Hornet all share common interests and experience. Horney has a lot of online dating features and as well as contents that are provoking and ideal for both bisexual men and gay men. You can access the app using different language, including Simplified Chinese, Indonesian, Afrikaans, Polish, Japanese, and English.

Features On Hornet

Best Hookup Dating Site For Over 40

One of the best features on Horney is the updated events that the LGBT community has in the area. It’s quite similar to the Facebook Event that you see on your account. With the events, you will be able to check the latest and upcoming events in your area. You can attend to these events and mingle with other M4M, which will surely increase your chances of finding a partner.

How They Manage Scams

Hornet makes sure that your exact location will never be disclosed to other members. Of course, if you send your contact details and photos, then that will be under your own jurisdiction.

Pros:

You can use unlimited messaging to message other members as well. There are also a lot of features for free users.

Cons:

There are a lot of ads.

5. Gaydr

Gaydr is specifically made for bisexual men and gay guys from all over the world. Currently, there are more than 5 million members since its launch in the year 1999. You can easily download it on your iOS or Android devices if you don’t feel like using its desktop version. Downloading is free for everyone.

Features On Gaydr

One of the best features of Gaydris the Gaydr Travel, wherein you can share your travel plans and as well as itinerary to other members. This will surely give you ample of time to connect with members who are living in your location.

How They Manage Scams

Gaydr will never disclose your actual location to other members, which will keep your privacy secured.

Pros:

You can message a member without any limits, and you will be protected from bullying and disrespectful language.

Cons:

Over

Best Dating Sites For Singles Over 60

You need to purchase a subscription for you to be able to use other features.

Best M4M Personals Sites (Top 4 Picks)

1. Men Nation Review

Men Nation has the most significant number of M4M based in North America. There are 4 million members who are all active, and the site supports all sorts of relationships, including one night stands, serious relationships, and even gay marriages. This personals site’s goal is to help men find the right men for them.

Features On Men Nation

One of the best features of Men Nation is that there are a lot of articles from their members. These articles give insights into the M4M dating world and everything that comes with it — some of the other features, including enhanced messaging and photo rating.

How They Manage Scams

Men Nation also verifies all of the profiles of their members to keep the community safe from scammers and fake accounts.

Pros:

Value for money is right on Men Nation, which means that you will get your money’s worth.

Cons:

Free membership offers very limited access to features.

2. Match Review

Whether you are looking for friends or someone to love, Match is perfect for M4M.

With the algorithms on Match, you will surely meet the guy that you’re most compatible with. One of the best things about Match is that they have experts who can help you complete your profile. These people can help you make sure that you’re going to find your soulmate on this site soon.

Features On Match

One of the best features that you can use on Match is that on your profile, all the needed information will help you market yourself with all of the potential matches on the site. The best thing that you can do is to highlight all of the best personalities that you have. Uploading a recent photo of yourself will also increase your chances of getting a good first impression with the members on Match.

In fact, profiles which have pictures in it get more messages. The reason behind this is because it shows other members that you’re serious in finding someone to be with on the site.

How They Manage Scams

Match manages scams by ensuring that members are all verified using their respective emails. They also let their members report anyone who is suspicious and Match will investigate. The reported member can either be suspended or banned.

Pros:

With the high number of members, you will surely be able to find one that will match your personality.

Cons:

Some features on Match will require you to purchase a subscription.

3. Zoosk Review

Zoosk has been here for 12 years for both of their straight and gay community. They have a M4M community that cater to gay men who are also looking for a partner that they can be within the long run. The site has more than 40 million members who are all looking for their soulmate and even friendship.

Features On Zoosk

Unlike other personals sites, Zoosk uses behavioral technology, which will help members matched using their behaviors. This technology is called the SmartPick, which use the member’s behavioral data so they can show you the users who have the same behavior as you. You can view your matches via their Dating Insights page. In this way, you can check them out and send them a message, so you can get to know that guy that you’re eyeing.

How They Manage Scams

Over

Just like other reputable personals sites, Zoosk will let their members link their social media accounts to verify their identity. Zoosk will also require you verify your account using your email or phone number. A code will be sent to you, which you need to enter to help validate your account.

Pros:

Includes a lot of matchmaking features, which will help you find that guy that you’ve been dreaming of.

Cons:

SmartPick will require you to subscribe to Zoosk’s subscriptions.

4. Elite Singles Review

Another M4M personals are Elite Singles, which uses a personality survey for the site to know whose members you’re compatible with. Just like other M4M personals sites, Elite Singles has a lot of success stories from different parts of the globe. The reason may be is because of the thousands of members that join every single week. This contributes to the thousands of new couples every single month.

Features On Elite Singles

One of the features that Elite Singles has is the personality analysis, where M4M can take and let the site show them their best matches. You shouldn’t worry about your privacy, because it will remain protected even after taking a personality analysis tests. Elite Singles will also provide you with profiles of potential M4M that might match with you.

How They Manage Scams

Elite Singles lets their members verify all of their profiles via their customer care. This means that all of the profiles of M4M on the site are legitimate.

Pros:

Almost 82% of Elite SIngle’s members are known as university educated.

Cons:

You need to get a paid membership so you can get unlimited access to the features.

What Happened To Craigslists Personals

Craigslist is one of the very first personals sites but was shut down by the congress. Craigslist personals was like a dating or a hookup site, where people can find someone that they can date and meet up with. Also, Craigslist personals were used for sex trafficking people, including children.

But it came to the attention of the Congress and the law says that the misuse of online personals unlawfully will be removed and the people behind it might be imprisoned. That’s why it was removed because it endangers everyone who joins.

Best Dating App For Singles Over 40

The sole purpose of Craigslists personals is to offer services, including home improvement, educational, and anything professional. It is not meant for sexual services or the like.

Best Hookup Dating Site For Over 40 People

Verdict

For the M4M personals site, Match is definitely the top one because if you are someone who is looking for a serious relationship, you will definitely find it here. Of course, there are also some instances where casual relationships may be offered. All you have to do is to find one that is on the same page as you.

As for the M4M hookup sites and apps, the best would be Adult Friend Finder because of how easy it is to use.

Conclusion

Dating Sites For Singles Over 40

With all that being said, the top 9 best M4M personals sites will surely help you find that guy that you want to be serious with. Of course, there are also hookup sites and apps, which will help you find a casual encounter if you’re not ready to be in a serious relationship with. Just make sure to take extra precaution when giving out your information and when meeting up in person to be safe.